Big Boys Don't Cry is a podcast in which Paddy Johnston and Rob Gordon discuss romantic films.
We paid a visit to Yorkshire this week, or as it’s called in film, God’s Own Country! Last year’s excellent movie of the same name is discussed, along with sheep’s cheese, hedgehog crisps, marmite, and lots of other glorious crap your hosts were eating back in the 90s. We also declare that Winston Churchill was ‘tangy like a good Cheddar.’ There’s more poetry in that line than in the whole of Darkest Hour.
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On this episode we discuss the wedding film of the century, Table 19. But what happened on the other 18 tables? Listen in to find out! We also discuss hamsters, watching films on planes, gammon (as in middle-aged men), the Cleveland baseball team, Disney songs, TV shows about doctors, and how all fans are bad. Stop liking things. Stop it.
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It’s our 40th episode, and to celebrate, we’re giving the people what they want and discussing fan request Martha, Meet Frank, Daniel and Laurence (or The Very Thought of You). We also discuss TED Talks for mice, have a long chat about Pokémon, get philosophical about the future of storytelling, and pay tribute to Ursula Le Guin. The song at the end of the episode is the new single by our band, Palomino Club!
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What would you do if the world was going to end in 21 days? Hopefully not end up in a forced and boring romance! We discuss the 2012 slightly below-the-radar film Seeking a Friend for the End of the World in this episode, and we also argue about mumbling pixie dream boy Michael Cera, diss Damien Hirst, and make a plan to drive around insulting people we don’t like in the shadow of the apocalypse, starting with Jacob Rees-Mogg (aka Walter from the Beano). There’s also an all-important update on our musical adaptation of The Godfather.
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Charlie Brooker on 50 Cent’s Game
At long last, we’re getting down with Richard Linklater! In this episode we discuss his influential heavy-talking’ 1995 classic Before Sunrise, mostly focusing our talk on Ethan Hawke’s facial hair. We also make some futurist projections (listen in, Elon Musk) and make a new plan for the UK to get ahead in the Brexit negotiations: send in Vinnie Jones.
We know how much everyone loves Russell Brand and a made-up Dracula puppet musical, so we finally got around to discussing Forgetting Sarah Marshall! Also covered in this week are a lot of puns on Infinite Jest, the brilliance of Air Bud, censorship, laughing at death, flightless birds, and Radiohead vs Lana Del Rey.
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Don’t vomit, but this week’s episode is all about the excellent romantic comedy The Big Sick! As well as discussing how much we both enjoyed this film, we also talk about people playing themselves, public transport, the 1980s film Clue, and whether Rotten Tomatoes is the Brexit of film criticism.
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Ray Romano on the emptiness of success (ft. Marc Maron)
It’s the first episode of 2018, so of course we discuss our resolutions and reflect on the jetpackless year ahead before delving into this week’s douchebag-fetishising film, Love and Other Drugs. We also spend a long time discussing 90s music (specifically 1997), take a break to give our own rendition of Reef’s classic song Place Your Hands, and finally catch up about The Disaster Artist. If you’re a Radiohead fan, Paddy apologises in advance for his opinions in this episode. He won’t apologise for stating the truth that the Macarena is a crime against music, though.
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Luke Evans in Wales Tourist Board advert
Billy Bragg - Way Over Yonder in the Minor Key
Weezer ft. Chamillionaire - Can’t Stop Partying
It’s the last episode of the year, so we’d like to take this opportunity to thank you all so much for listening. As a token of our appreciation, we present a lively discussion of the truly awful film New Year’s Eve. May 2018 bring you better films than this one!
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Christmas Day is right around the corner, and what better way to celebrate the ensuing festivity than by discussing Elf? Not be confused with the creepy and terrible phenomenon the Elf on the Shelf, which we discuss at length, whilst comparing the Baldwin brothers, speculating as to what Guy Fieri cooks on Christmas Day, and welcoming Noel Gallagher to Trash Island.
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Holidays are coming, holidays are coming! On this episode we discuss syrupy Christmas romance The Holiday, whilst also debating the merits of Guy Fieri-themed Christmas jumpers, talking about famous people whose birthdays we share, and the search begins for right-wing rom-coms. There's nothing more festive than libertarianism!
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We’re deep into December now, and when you’re deep into December you have to ask yourself the question: what is love, actually? We answer this question in detail in this episode, whilst also celebrating Rob’s new kitten, Paddy’s house move and the good times we had playing Zoo Tycoon back in the day.
Jingle bells, Batman smells, Rob Gordon laid an egg! We’re watching Christmas films all through December, and we’re kicking off our festive frolics with our review of the brand new Netflix original film, A Christmas Prince. We also have an update on candidates for Trash Island, and dedicate a fair amount of time to discussing the magic of Don Bluth.
Recorded on International Men’s Day and released on Black Friday, it’s a podcast for big days this week, as we reflect on the post-Brexit drinks landscape, imagine playing Mario Kart with Tom Waits, and up our political content. Oh, and we also talk about a romantic film. This week: Friends With Benefits!
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On our most tangential episode yet, fueled by pizza, we discuss the 2003 classic romantic comedy How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. Matthew McConaughey’s handsomeness is debated, Papa John’s is dismissed as the worst pizza, and we come up with a new TV show pilot, Trash Island. Also contains spoilers for Stranger Things 2 (spoiler: Paddy cried).
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Cards Against Humanity - Potatoes
It’s our second sixties outing in this week’s episode, as we discuss the so-called classic, Breakfast at Tiffany’s! We also diss Ernest Hemingway, talking about writing and the writing process, and continue to be unable to get over having watched the entire Twilight saga two episodes ago.
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Deep Blue Something - Breakfast at Tiffany's
Sugarcult - Bouncing off the Walls
Horror month is over and it’s getting colder, so this week we chose to watch a film that would make us feel warm inside. As well as discussing Away We Go, we also keep talking about Twilight as we can’t get it out of our heads, and we have a pop at the latest group of alt-right fools, the Proud Boys.
Our month of romantic horror draws to a close with our biggest podcast challenge yet: the entire Twilight Saga. Can Rob and Paddy make it through over ten hours of sad wolves, mumbly dialogue, vampires that randomly gain superpowers when it suits the plot, and creepy wolf-baby relationships? Listen in and you’ll find out.
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Our month of romantic horror continues with a discussion of the 2015 independent body horror romance Spring. We also have a brief flat earth update, a discussion of World Mental Health Day, and hooligans.
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Our month of spooky romance continues with our second romance-horror film, Crimson Peak. We discuss gothicness, ghosts, how Paddy is a Cumberbatch Denier, and Robert Redford's new outing in the film Our Souls at Night (be sure to read that title back to yourself with a British accent). Sadly some kind of spooky ghost got into Rob's mic halfway through the recording, so there's a crackly, atmospheric noise on some of the recording. An exorcism will be performed before next week's show. #MOONPUTIN
